Pesto Pasta Pretender

Pesto Pasta Pretender

In my skinny bethiness I have almost completely rejected carb heavy spagehtti as a dietary option. But we all know that sometimes nothing can satisfy your cravings like some good old fashioned spaghetti.

Well, let me tell you...for the past 3 weeks I have been eating nothing but my very own pretend pesto pasta. Let me explain:

Instead of spaghetti....you use zuchinni! Don't run away in disbelief to another recipe site. I swear on my very skinny betch's skinniness (and we know I would never risk that sacrifice) that this tastes as delish as carbed up fat kid pasta. Here we go...

Pesto Pasta Pretender

- 4 -6 yellow or green squash/zuchhini (depending on how much you want)

- Basil Pesto of your choice (check if your local health food store or supermarket has a low calorie pesto)

Optional Toppings:

Reduced fat KRAFT parmesan cheese

diced cherry, plum, grape or heirloom tomatoes (basically any chopped up tomato)

chopped mushroom

Mornng star chicken less chicken strips

Be Creative: What do you like on your pasta???

Directions:

1. You have 2 choices, you can use a sharp knife and cut each squash in half and then cut them into long thinnnnn strips

OR

you can use the type of grater that cuts single flat, paper thin strips (this is much easier and produces a flat linguini type pasta)

2. Throw all zuchhini strips in pot and cook until reach desired softness (add any additional toppings in to pot to cook as well)

3. When thouroughly cooked, drain all excess liquid from pot

4. Add pesto and stir thouroughly

5. Enjoy your pesto-saucy goodness, guilt-free!

Thank me later,

Another Skinny Betch

Fat Kid Guacamole for a Skinny Betch

Good for You Gucamole Recipe

You know your fat kid at heart wants it...

• 2 avocados
• ½ fresh squeezed lime (or more to taste)
• tsp. pre-minced garlic (they sell it in jars)

If you have time, sauté the garlic briefly in a pan or microwave in order to cook it; cooked garlic doesn’t give you as bad of breath as raw garlic)

• 1 large tomato or ½ package of plum tomatoes chopped
• Dash of Salt and Pepper to taste
• Onion (optional—again cook it if you can to reduce breath factor)
• ½ cup minced cilantro (optional)
• Jalapeno pepper cut into small pieces (optional)

Instead of buying chips, buy soft corn or multigrain (remember multigrain has fiber and fiber makes you a super skinny betch) tortillas, out them in a 450 degree oven for about 5 minutes or until crispy. break them up, and eat like chips!

Your skinny betch self will successfully trick your fat kid at heart into thinking your eating fried tortilla chips..I promise.

Thank me later,

Another Skinny Betch

Not so Much Nacho Niblets

Cheesy Cakes & 

Not So Much Nachos

So I know my skinny betches who are fat kids at heart don’t only crave their sweets.

Hungover, tired and have un unavoidable, unignorable craving for cheese?

No, never happened to you? Then find a different site to browse. This page is obviously not for you, and you are truly enviable for your skinny betch ways.

Anyways, I have 2 versions of my recipe for when your craving a salty, crunchy, cheesy snack (or meal).

Not so Much Nacho Niblets

These look and feel like real nachos if that’s what you really need at the moment. I’m a Sunday Funday nacho eater myself..It’s a similar process as above…here we go..

• Soft Round Corn or multigrain Tortillas - put in 450 degree oven until crispy - about 5 minutes (they taste exactly like chips except their not fried!!!)   

           or

• Plain Quaker Oats Brand Rice Cake Bite Size Pieces – spread evenly over large plate

• Weight Watchers brand String Cheese (60 cals)

            Or

• 75% fat free cabot cheddar cheese (YESS it exists).

            Or, if you’re into it…

• Vegetarian Soy product cheese (it’s not my thing but go for it)

Directions:

• String or slice the cheese thinly (or as thickly as your fat kid self wants)
• Evenly place cheese over rice cake bites (you can then add another layer and repeat if your having a skinny betch party.
• Melt in microwave for 1 – 1 ½ mins
• Salsa on top (find your favorite or lowest cal kind)
• Chop up jalapeno peppers into rings to put on top
• If you absolutely need it, use fat free tofu sour cream
• Avocados (see next page for guacamole recipe)

**Spicy foods increase your metabolism so if you like spicy, by all means, add chili powder, jalapeno peppers and/or the spiciest salsa you can handle.

Cheesy Cake Recipe

If you want to be even more of a skinny betch these are less nachoey and more skinny betch

• Buy Quaker Brand or some organic brand Rice Cakes (get plain or something with whole wheat, flax, etc.) 

Basically spend 5 minutes looking at the calorie to fiber ratio on the nutrition label in the rice cake section and find the lowest cal cake with the highest fiber (I trust you, you are well-practiced in this art).

If you are have somehow missed the fiber craze, fiber makes you poop more regularly and easily, and all skinny betches want a flat tummy, not one filled with processed fat kid junk..sorry even skinny betches need to go number 2..its the skinniest thing one can do…moving on…)

• Weight Watchers brand String Cheese (60 cals)

            Or

• 75% fat free cabot cheddar cheese (YESS it exists).

            Or, if you’re into it…

• Vegetarian Soy product cheese (it’s not my thing but go for it)

Directions:

• String or slice the cheese thinly (or as thickly as your fat kid self wants)
• Evenly place cheese over 1-2 rice cakes
• Melt in microwave for 1 – 1 ½ mins
• I enjoy eating it with only cheese but you can add the following…
• Dollop of salsa on top (find your favorite or lowest cal kind)
• Chop up jalapeno peppers to put on top

Thank me later,

Another Skinny Betch

Healthy Hot Cocoa

Healthy Hot Cocoa

You know you want a 40 calorie hot chocolate right about now...

• 1 cup fat-free milk (I prefer Almond Joy 40 calorie Almond Milk because its thick and delicious)
• 1 Tbls. Sugarfree Baking Cocoa Powder (Hershey’s Brand or Organic Brand found in baking aisle)
• 1 – 2 ouches of stevia powder
• 1 tsp vanilla extract (optional)

For Aztec Cocoa

Follow the above recipe and add:

½ tsp chili powder

½ tsp cinammon

      you can do less or more depending on your personal taste

**chili powder increases metabolism

**cinammon helps prevent and ease symptoms of adult diabetes

Whipped Cream

All fat kids at heart secretey want that dolop of whipcream on top..Your in luck!

You can either buy 5 calorie reddi whip whipped cream or 15 calorie fat free and sugar free cool whip..Exciting right??

If you want to be an even skinnier betch, you can buy a frother, basically you put fat free milk and stevia in a cup (add vanilla if you want it to be muy delicioso) and froth. it turns your milk into a frothy, whipped cream like substance.

Thank me later,

Another Skinny Betch

Too Good to Be True Hot Fudge

Too Good to be True 

Hot Fudge

I wasn’t lying to you in the last post that you could make hot fudge sundaes.

I am not about to have you buy an ice cream maker (but feel free to try it out).

First, you have go to the supermarket and buy fat free/sugar free frozen yogurt.

Sometimes you have to settle for one or the other (sugar-free or fat-free).

2 options that actually taste like ice cream and come in a normal sized ice cream container at a normal price are:

Turkey Hill has a good vanilla low calorie frozen yogurt.

Edy’s has a chocolate vanilla swirl that’s also one of the best options.

Otherwise you will just have to spend more mula than you should on a too small container of fat free, sugar free frozen yogurt.

Once you have the ice cream or frozen yogurt, feel free to add:

1 tsp. vanilla extract and/or peppermint extract, and/or

1 Tbls. Sugar free cocoa powder(you can find this in the baking section, it is not chocolate milk or hot cocoa powder. It is straight ground cocoa with nothing caloric, sugary or fattening in it, just antioxidants)

Too Good to be True Hot Fudge Recipe

3 Tbls. Cocoa powder

2 Tbls. Stevia Powder

Splash of fat free milk (preferably almond milk because its so thick and creamy and only 40 calories a swerving!!!!)

2 Tbls. Margarine made with vegetable oil and for a bonus one with omega 3s

-       Microwave for 1-2 minutes and stir

-       Add milk for desired consistency

-       You can refridgerate and save (it will hardern so just add a splash of milk and microwave for delicious reuse)

Add hot fudge to your ice cream and enjoy!

For an even more amazing brownie a la mode experience buy  or order online “NO PUDGE BROWNIE” mix. You simply mix a Tbls of the low cal powder with 2 tablespoons fat-free/sugar-free yogurt and microwave for 1 minute. It is the greatest thing in existence. Trust Me.

Thank me later,

Another Skinny Betch

Mint Chocolate Fake Shake

Mint Chocolate Fake Shake
So I hope you have been enjoying your high fiber, high antioxidant faux fudge (date/cocoa) balls.

But I believe you want something more. In my experience, sometimes my sweet tooth cannot be satiated by a piece of chocolate. When you are craving an ice cream sundae or a milkshake, that’s exactly what you need and what I am going to give you.

Mint Chocolate Fake Shake

First the mint chocolate shake can be made into coffee or chocolate or plain vanilla or strawberry depending on what you like.

Recipe for Fake Milk Shake & Faux Frappaccino (30 calories!!!!!!)

• Fill Blender with Ice
• Add ½ cup of fat free milk (almond milk is the best because it is sooo thick and delicious, and like totally only 40 cals)
• 1 tsp Vanilla Extract
• 1-2 individual pouches of Stevia Powder (Stevia is the best 0 calorie sweetener for you but if you care more about being a skinny betch than getting cancer or having your small intestine disentigrate, use splenda or other artificial sweeteners).stevia

For Chocolate:

1 Tbls. or more sugarless cocoa powder (found in the baking aisle, either Hersheys brand or any organic brand—this is not hot chocolate or chocolate milk mix it is straight up grown cocoa beans with no sugar, fat or anything other than antioxidants) hershey's coca powder organic

For Mint Chocolate:

1 Tbls. (or more) sugarless cocoa powder

1 tsp. (or more to taste) peppermint extract

For Mocha Frappaccino

1 Tbls. (or more) sugarless cocoa powder

1 Tbls. Instant coffee powder

Extra tsp. Stevia (to taste)

Strawberry

½ cup strawberries 








P.S. Now, I have an extra awesome secret to share...there is a company called herbalife that makes all delicious edible products that make you skinny..They have meal replacement protein shakes that taste like a mint chocolate chip milkshake. Go to the website and order the protein powder and the healthy meal nutritional shake in mint flavor.milkshake Mix the two together with milk or water and find yourself drinking a low cal so skinny betch milkshake (They also sell totally skinny betch tea powder that burns 80 cals everytime you drink it! tea)




Thank me later,

Another Skinny Betch

Faux Fudge Balls

Faux Fudge Balls

My first, most important, most life changing, easiest, quickest recipe for those of us who cannot go a day (or our period) without our chocolate fix are chocolate balls. Yes. Chocolate balls. All skinny betches love them.

Recipe for Faux Fudge Balls

• Soft Dates (must be very soft, dry dates will not work)

• Sugarless cocoa powder (found in the baking aisle, either Hershey's brand or any organic brand—this is not hot chocolate or chocolate milk mix it is straight up ground cocoa beans with no sugar, fat or anything other than delicious (fat and cancer reducing) antioxidants)cocoa

Directions: 

• Mush up with hands until dates are completely one with the cocoa powder, and roll into balls
• Add cocoa to taste and sprinkle on top when done

Add coconut shavings if thats what you are into..or anything else that tastes delicious with chocolate

You may need to protect your skinny betch mani but I promise its worth it. 

Lesson of the day: Dates + sugarless cocoa powder = skinny betch fudge
I promise you won’t have to pretend its good. It is. So don't be too betchy and lazy to go out and buy the 2 ingredients you need to make the easiest fucking thing in the world. You won't regret it and either will that boy your dating who's always known you as a true blue skinny betch.

Yours truly,

Another Skinny Betch